How I Resolved Conflicts with Engineering Managers: Practical Examples
As a Senior Product Manager, I often collaborate with engineering managers to build great products. Sometimes, we face disagreements because we look at problems differently. While I focus on customer needs and business goals, they prioritize technical stability and feasibility. These differences can lead to conflicts, but I’ve learned that handling them well strengthens our teamwork and makes the product better.
Here, I’ll share two simple, real-life examples of conflicts I’ve faced with engineering managers and how I resolved them.
Example 1: Disagreement on Priorities
The Situation:
In one project, I wanted the team to quickly work on a new feature that several customers had requested. However, the engineering manager felt it wasn’t the right time. They were concerned about the extra work it would add to the system and suggested focusing on cleaning up some old technical issues first.
The Problem:
I was thinking about how the feature could make our customers happy. The engineering manager was thinking about how the feature could cause problems if built on an unstable system.
What I Did:
Talked to Understand:
I sat down with the engineering manager and asked them to explain their concerns in detail. They shared examples of similar past issues that caused delays because the team rushed into building new features without fixing the underlying problems.Looked at the Big Picture:
Together, we looked at our goals for the quarter. We realized that delivering this feature would help customers, but fixing the system first would make future work smoother.Found a Middle Ground:
We decided to spend one sprint (two weeks) fixing the technical issues. After that, we would start working on the feature. I informed stakeholders about this plan, and they supported the decision because it was well-explained.
The Outcome:
The technical fixes helped the team build the feature faster and with fewer bugs. Both the engineering manager and I felt satisfied because we listened to each other and made a balanced decision.
Example 2: Different Ideas for a Solution
The Situation:
During another project, I suggested a new feature that needed a complex design. The engineering manager suggested a simpler version that was easier to build, but it didn’t fully solve the problem for users.
The Problem:
I was focused on creating a great experience for users. The engineering manager was worried about the time and resources needed to build my idea.
What I Did:
Brought in Data:
I shared feedback from customers and data showing why this feature was important. This helped the engineering manager see why I was pushing for it.Collaborated on Ideas:
Instead of arguing, we held a meeting with the design and engineering teams to brainstorm. Together, we came up with a middle solution: a design that wasn’t as complex as my original idea but still met customer needs.Kept Everyone in the Loop:
I updated stakeholders about the changes to ensure everyone was aligned and understood the trade-offs.
The Outcome:
The feature launched on time, and users appreciated it. The engineering team felt proud because we solved the problem without overloading them.
What I Learned
Listen and Understand: Conflicts usually happen because we have different priorities, not because someone is wrong. Taking time to understand the other person’s perspective helps a lot.
Use Data: Bringing data or customer feedback into the discussion makes it easier to reach a decision.
Work Together: Instead of trying to “win” a disagreement, focus on finding a solution that works for both sides.
Communicate Clearly: Keeping everyone informed about decisions and reasons builds trust.
Conflicts are a part of working in teams, especially when building products. What matters is how you handle them. By working through disagreements with empathy and collaboration, you not only solve problems but also build stronger relationships with your team.
Do you have a similar experience? Share how you handled it!